What Is A Relationship?
What should you do if you suspect you are in a relationship? Or on the brink of one? If you're a man, you needn't tell anyone until it becomes 'serious.' At that point you needn't bother. Everyone on Planet Earth or at least everyone within two hundred miles of where she and her mother live has heard.
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Satisfy Them Everytime...
How To Satisfy A Woman Every Time:
Caress, praise, pamper, relish, savor, massage, make plans, fix, empathize, serenade...
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The Game Of Romance: How To Keep Score
Simple Duties
  • You go out to buy her flowers: +5
  • But return with beer: -5
  • You check out a suspicious noise at night: 0
  • You check out a suspicious noise and it's nothing: 0
  • You check out a suspicious noise and it's something: +5
  • You pummel it with a six iron: +10
  • It's her father: -25

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Recipe: Valentine's Day Caviar Heart Kisses
Special recipe for Valentine's Day Caviar Heart Kisses

Type: Appetizers, Seafood
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A Love Letter By Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart
PS.--while I was writing the last page, tear after tear fell on the paper. But I must cheer up--catch!--An astonishing number of kisses are flying about---The deuce!--I see a whole crowd of them! Ha! Ha!...I have just caught three--They are delicious!--You can still answer this letter, but you must address your reply to Linz, Poste Restante--That is the safest course. As I do not yet know for certain whether I shall go to Regensburg, I can't tell you anything definite.
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